You know when you’re at the club or at a bar or even perhaps at a concert? Maybe the music is loud or people are drunk and obnoxious. Either way, you’re trying to have a conversation with somebody, but instead of talking over the background noise, you lean forward to talk into that person’s ear…
Then… when you’re done talking you lean back. Maybe when they start talking, you lean forward again so you can hear. When they finish talking, you lean back once again.
You continue to lean back and forth… back and forth… in a pecking motion. It kinda makes you feel like a pecking chicken… doesn’t it?
Well guess what? This is a major turn-off when interacting with a girl. It shows to her that you’re putting in a lot of effort in order to interact with her, so she must undoubtedly really mean something to you… even though you’ve perhaps just approached her for the very first time.
Another big mistake guys make in this situation is: they face the girl with their chest pointed directly at her. This makes you come off as needy to her subconscious filtering mechanism.
Have you ever been in a situation where you’re facing one way (away from a person at an angle), but they are facing you with their chest and face pointed directly at you. From your peripheral vision, it kinda makes it look like they’re staring at you… peering deep down into your soul. It makes you feel uncomfortable… doesn’t it?
So what’s the right way to approach and interact with a girl for the very first time in a situation such as this?
Approach Mechanism Tips For Men
Well… obviously you’re going to want to avoid the aforementioned body language and subconscious signs that are screaming to her, “reject me… reject me! I’m a sad, insecure little boy. Don’t waste you’re time with me!”
Firstly, you want to approach her indirectly. Do not walk directly towards her with your whole body facing her. Just walk at a slight angle as if you were to walk past her. Make sure you take big, confident steps when walking (again, not directly towards her). Pull your shoulders down without pushing out your chest. Keep your chin up and look around over everybody as if you are the man and you own the place (only with your body language).
When stopping in her vicinity, keep your body facing slightly away from her at an angle (especially your chest). When speaking to her, do not lean in. Make sure your voice is loud, clear, and confident. If she can’t hear what you say… say it again, but don’t lean in. Let her be the one to lean in.
If she responds in a soft-spoken voice to where you can’t hear her, again, do not lean in. Just rotate your head at a slight angle to point your ear towards he mouth. Never move your whole body towards her where you’re pivoting at the hips.
During the stage where you’re trying to build attraction, you cannot let your body give you away. Her subconscious filtering mechanism needs to be left guessing. You have to come off as someone that is very confident in themselves and doesn’t have any fears about talking to any strange people or being the focus of attention. Remember, you don’t have to be the focus of attention… just show with your body language that you wouldn’t care if you were.
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